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Chuck Norris is God

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Top 10 Facts:
# 100A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.
4.35 Roundhouse Kicks (2036 votes)Rate it:12345

# 83Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
4.28 Roundhouse Kicks (3279 votes)Rate it:12345

# 1Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. But he is so badass, he has never cried. Ever.
4.26 Roundhouse Kicks (4253 votes)Rate it:12345

# 151Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
4.25 Roundhouse Kicks (2346 votes)Rate it:12345

# 105Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
4.24 Roundhouse Kicks (3198 votes)Rate it:12345

# 178Chuck Norris lost his viginity before his dad did.
4.23 Roundhouse Kicks (1641 votes)Rate it:12345

# 196Mr. A once claimed that he's tougher than Chuck Norris. Upon hearing about this, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him so hard he flew 19 letters back in the alphabet, becoming Mr. T. Chuck Norris does not pity the fool.
4.22 Roundhouse Kicks (1461 votes)Rate it:12345

# 381In the Coke vs. Pepsi Challenge, Chuck Norris chose Sprite...and he was right.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (1776 votes)Rate it:12345

# 536Scientists created Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sly Stallone, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Vin Diesel, and Hulk Hogan by using urine samples from a toilet Chuck Norris once pissed in.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (620 votes)Rate it:12345

# 101Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
4.19 Roundhouse Kicks (2727 votes)Rate it:12345

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15 Random Facts: (more)
# 73Chuck Norris sheds his skin twice a year.
2.56 Roundhouse Kicks (545 votes)Rate it:12345

# 441Windows will not lock up on Chuck Norris. Because Windows is afraid.
3.63 Roundhouse Kicks (334 votes)Rate it:12345

# 134Chuck Norris has his own HTML code. It is <roundhouse kick="in your face">
2.81 Roundhouse Kicks (439 votes)Rate it:12345

# 536Scientists created Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sly Stallone, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Vin Diesel, and Hulk Hogan by using urine samples from a toilet Chuck Norris once pissed in.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (620 votes)Rate it:12345

# 386When someone sneezes, the polite thing to do is say "Chuck bless you."
3.26 Roundhouse Kicks (377 votes)Rate it:12345

# 81Chuck Norris' house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.
3.79 Roundhouse Kicks (529 votes)Rate it:12345

# 206The only reason we have lesboes is because the chicks who have already had Chuck Norris don't know who else to try.
3.83 Roundhouse Kicks (409 votes)Rate it:12345

# 603Chuck Norris can catch a tiger by its tail.
3.12 Roundhouse Kicks (299 votes)Rate it:12345

# 168Chuck Norris' girlfriend once asked him how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood. He then shouted, "HOW DARE YOU RHYME IN THE PRESENCE OF CHUCK NORRIS!" and ripped out her throat. Holding his girlfriend's bloody throat in his hand he bellowed, "Don't **** with Chuck!" Two years and five months later he realized the irony of this statement and laughed so hard that anyone within a hundred mile radius of the blast went deaf.
3.65 Roundhouse Kicks (566 votes)Rate it:12345

# 356Chuck Norris loves the ladies, and the ladies love him back. Or else.
3.59 Roundhouse Kicks (383 votes)Rate it:12345

# 330Chuck Norris took that missing sock from your dryer.
3.88 Roundhouse Kicks (460 votes)Rate it:12345

# 339Could Chuck Norris microwave a burrito so hot that he himself couldn't eat it? Hell fuck 'naw!
2.62 Roundhouse Kicks (360 votes)Rate it:12345

# 531God used to make frequent trips to earth to talk to various people. Upon seeing Chuck Norris' manly good looks God vanquished himself to heaven, never to be seen again out of embarassment of his own self image. It's rumored Chuck is currently God's personal fitness trainer.
3.33 Roundhouse Kicks (297 votes)Rate it:12345

# 176Chuck Norris is the man now dog.
1.91 Roundhouse Kicks (560 votes)Rate it:12345

# 616CHUCK NORRIS
2.71 Roundhouse Kicks (542 votes)Rate it:12345

-- More Random Facts --

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