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Chuck Norris is God - ChuckNorrisIsGod.com

Chuck Norris is God

Top 10


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Top 10 Facts:
# 100A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.
4.35 Roundhouse Kicks (2037 votes)Rate it:12345

# 83Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
4.28 Roundhouse Kicks (3280 votes)Rate it:12345

# 1Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. But he is so badass, he has never cried. Ever.
4.26 Roundhouse Kicks (4253 votes)Rate it:12345

# 151Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
4.25 Roundhouse Kicks (2347 votes)Rate it:12345

# 105Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
4.24 Roundhouse Kicks (3198 votes)Rate it:12345

# 178Chuck Norris lost his viginity before his dad did.
4.23 Roundhouse Kicks (1641 votes)Rate it:12345

# 196Mr. A once claimed that he's tougher than Chuck Norris. Upon hearing about this, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him so hard he flew 19 letters back in the alphabet, becoming Mr. T. Chuck Norris does not pity the fool.
4.22 Roundhouse Kicks (1462 votes)Rate it:12345

# 381In the Coke vs. Pepsi Challenge, Chuck Norris chose Sprite...and he was right.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (1777 votes)Rate it:12345

# 536Scientists created Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sly Stallone, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Vin Diesel, and Hulk Hogan by using urine samples from a toilet Chuck Norris once pissed in.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (620 votes)Rate it:12345

# 101Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
4.19 Roundhouse Kicks (2728 votes)Rate it:12345

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15 Random Facts: (more)
# 328Chuck Norris' chest hair are use to cut diamond... they weight 12 pounds each and are viral.
2.74 Roundhouse Kicks (301 votes)Rate it:12345

# 249When Chuck Norris walked out of his mother's womb, beard and all, his doctor tried to spank him but Chuck quickly Roundhouse kicked him into orbit, as the doctor landed he killed all the dinosaurs and himself, this was the 4th person Chuck Norris killed.
3.41 Roundhouse Kicks (339 votes)Rate it:12345

# 675the only thing that can kill Chuck Norris is the combined effort of Gandalf the Grey, Gandal the White, Monty Python and the Holy Grial's Black Night, and Benito Mussolini and The Blue Meanie and Cowboy Curtis and Jambi the Genie, Robocop, the Terminator, Captain Kirk, and Darth Vader Lo Pan, Superman, every single Power Ranger Bill S. Preston and Theodore Logan, Spock, The Rock, Doc Ock, and Hulk Hogan. And they'd still need the element of surprise.
3.98 Roundhouse Kicks (1110 votes)Rate it:12345

# 233To prove that urban legends are true and Chuck Norris isn't afraid of anything, Chuck Norris spun around in a chair yelling bloody mary only to roundhouse kick her in the face and eventually have his way with her.
3.56 Roundhouse Kicks (338 votes)Rate it:12345

# 647If you locked Chuck Norris in a room for six months with a guitar, he could make the perfect album. When asked why he doesn't do this, he responded, "Music is for idiots." To prove how serious he was about this statement, he swallowed a knife.
3.46 Roundhouse Kicks (354 votes)Rate it:12345

# 310Chuck Norris was there for the Clone Wars. When some Jedi tried to use the force to defeat him, he laughed so hard that they were immediately transformed into a bunch of fictional characters created by some dude named George.
2.93 Roundhouse Kicks (363 votes)Rate it:12345

# 399ZZ Top were a Chuck Norris tribute band until he roundhouse kicked them for not being hairy enough.
3.04 Roundhouse Kicks (275 votes)Rate it:12345

# 509The single most successful anti-smoking measure was a commercial in the 1980's. In the commercial, there is a man smoking a cigarette. A voice then exclaims "Smoking will kill you." Nothing happens, until Chuck Norris blasts through the wall and kills the man with a single round house kick.
4.03 Roundhouse Kicks (1458 votes)Rate it:12345

# 57For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one.
4.16 Roundhouse Kicks (992 votes)Rate it:12345

# 291Chuck Norris once built a space station out of debris from his beard. Upon completion, Norris roundhouse kicked it into space with him on it. Soon after, CATS showed up to steal Chuck's beard-station. Just before he could finish saying, "All your base are belong to us," CATS received a roundhouse kick to the face, sending him sailing into space. After that, Chuck said, "All your face are belong to Chuck!" CATS received severe brain damage from the incident, was rendered handicapped from the neck down, and now tries to earn an honest living as a florist.
2.34 Roundhouse Kicks (364 votes)Rate it:12345

# 138The reason "We have it our way" is because Chuck Norris is threatening to roundhouse kick Ronald McDonald if we don't.
3.17 Roundhouse Kicks (414 votes)Rate it:12345

# 567Chuck Norris scored 16 million on the SAT's without ever reading the test booklet.
3.41 Roundhouse Kicks (307 votes)Rate it:12345

# 199Jimmy Hendrix did not die of a drug overdose. He happened to walk into the empty bar Chuck Norris was playing guitar at and promptly died.
3.04 Roundhouse Kicks (342 votes)Rate it:12345

# 144Chuck Norris has non-agression pacts with over 50 countries. He refuses to sign one with Vietnam and periodically makes menacing threats, though privately he insists that he's just messing around.
3.4 Roundhouse Kicks (388 votes)Rate it:12345

# 411Chuck Norris uses Brownies to chock the wheels of his Hummer.
2.26 Roundhouse Kicks (326 votes)Rate it:12345

-- More Random Facts --

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