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Chuck Norris is God

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Top 10 Facts:
# 100A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.
4.37 Roundhouse Kicks (2027 votes)Rate it:12345

# 83Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
4.28 Roundhouse Kicks (3279 votes)Rate it:12345

# 1Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. But he is so badass, he has never cried. Ever.
4.26 Roundhouse Kicks (4253 votes)Rate it:12345

# 151Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
4.25 Roundhouse Kicks (2345 votes)Rate it:12345

# 105Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
4.24 Roundhouse Kicks (3197 votes)Rate it:12345

# 178Chuck Norris lost his viginity before his dad did.
4.23 Roundhouse Kicks (1639 votes)Rate it:12345

# 196Mr. A once claimed that he's tougher than Chuck Norris. Upon hearing about this, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him so hard he flew 19 letters back in the alphabet, becoming Mr. T. Chuck Norris does not pity the fool.
4.22 Roundhouse Kicks (1460 votes)Rate it:12345

# 381In the Coke vs. Pepsi Challenge, Chuck Norris chose Sprite...and he was right.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (1775 votes)Rate it:12345

# 536Scientists created Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sly Stallone, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Vin Diesel, and Hulk Hogan by using urine samples from a toilet Chuck Norris once pissed in.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (615 votes)Rate it:12345

# 101Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
4.19 Roundhouse Kicks (2725 votes)Rate it:12345

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15 Random Facts: (more)
# 133Once Chuck Norris was sitting on a park bench. There were two guys with cell phones sitting there with him. The first guy had a Sprint phone, and the second guy had a Nextel phone. Both guys go "Hey, Chuck, you suck!" Then Chuck roundhouse kicked both of their faces at the same time. You know the rest.
1.82 Roundhouse Kicks (590 votes)Rate it:12345

# 525We are a figment of Chuck Norris's imagination.
3.52 Roundhouse Kicks (343 votes)Rate it:12345

# 226Chuck Norris came before both the chicken and the egg.
3.9 Roundhouse Kicks (405 votes)Rate it:12345

# 50Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
4.12 Roundhouse Kicks (1461 votes)Rate it:12345

# 247The leading cause of death in America is heart disease. Oddly enough, in a Native American language that has long since fallen into obscurity, 'heart disease' roughly translates into 'roundhouse kick to the face, biotch'. Coincidence?
2.84 Roundhouse Kicks (342 votes)Rate it:12345

# 251Once Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a tree, which promptly burst into flames, inventing fire. When others tried to do the same, they were all met with a roundhouse kick followed by "ONLY CHUCK NORRIS CAN CREATE FIRE". But he eventually realized his wonderful creation and looks the other way when they make fire by rubbing two sticks together. But everyone who tried to do so via roundhouse kick has met a terrible fate...
2.4 Roundhouse Kicks (295 votes)Rate it:12345

# 171The sun doesn't shine on Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris shines on the sun.
3.55 Roundhouse Kicks (397 votes)Rate it:12345

# 296Chuck Norris Went Into Space And Round-Kicked An Asteroid. The Freshly Round-Kicked Asteroid Went Back In TIme And Killed The Dinosaurs.
2.98 Roundhouse Kicks (338 votes)Rate it:12345

# 94If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the fuck down.
4.17 Roundhouse Kicks (1474 votes)Rate it:12345

# 46Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.
3.72 Roundhouse Kicks (588 votes)Rate it:12345

# 178Chuck Norris lost his viginity before his dad did.
4.23 Roundhouse Kicks (1639 votes)Rate it:12345

# 280The reason no one has found Tupac's and Notorious BIG's killers are because it was Chuck Norris.
2.64 Roundhouse Kicks (314 votes)Rate it:12345

# 234Chuck Norris' mayonaise covered hot dog bun is the Olympics' half pipe.
1.93 Roundhouse Kicks (391 votes)Rate it:12345

# 272Chuck Norris had sex with the mothers of Michael Jordan, John Elway, Babe Ruth, and Wayne Gretzky. This is no coincidence.
3.8 Roundhouse Kicks (510 votes)Rate it:12345

# 501Instead of "Built Ford Tough," Ford is changing its slogan to "Built Chuck Tough," in order to make more money.
3.1 Roundhouse Kicks (310 votes)Rate it:12345

-- More Random Facts --

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