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Chuck Norris is God - ChuckNorrisIsGod.com

Chuck Norris is God

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Top 10 Facts:
# 100A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.
4.35 Roundhouse Kicks (2036 votes)Rate it:12345

# 83Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
4.28 Roundhouse Kicks (3279 votes)Rate it:12345

# 1Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. But he is so badass, he has never cried. Ever.
4.26 Roundhouse Kicks (4253 votes)Rate it:12345

# 151Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
4.25 Roundhouse Kicks (2345 votes)Rate it:12345

# 105Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
4.24 Roundhouse Kicks (3198 votes)Rate it:12345

# 178Chuck Norris lost his viginity before his dad did.
4.23 Roundhouse Kicks (1640 votes)Rate it:12345

# 196Mr. A once claimed that he's tougher than Chuck Norris. Upon hearing about this, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him so hard he flew 19 letters back in the alphabet, becoming Mr. T. Chuck Norris does not pity the fool.
4.22 Roundhouse Kicks (1461 votes)Rate it:12345

# 381In the Coke vs. Pepsi Challenge, Chuck Norris chose Sprite...and he was right.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (1776 votes)Rate it:12345

# 536Scientists created Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sly Stallone, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Vin Diesel, and Hulk Hogan by using urine samples from a toilet Chuck Norris once pissed in.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (618 votes)Rate it:12345

# 101Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
4.19 Roundhouse Kicks (2725 votes)Rate it:12345

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15 Random Facts: (more)
# 505In the commercials for Hellman's Mayonaisse, when they say "bring out the Hellman's, bring out the best," Chuck Norris walks in front of the camera.
2.98 Roundhouse Kicks (317 votes)Rate it:12345

# 676Chuck Norris walks into the woods with a gun and comes across a bear. What does he do? Shoots himself in the leg to give the bear a chance to run.
3.87 Roundhouse Kicks (597 votes)Rate it:12345

# 75Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
4.14 Roundhouse Kicks (1530 votes)Rate it:12345

# 305The name Norris is actually Chinese for "One Who Roundhouse Kicks"
3.03 Roundhouse Kicks (384 votes)Rate it:12345

# 28Chuck Norris once bet NASA he could survive re-entry without a spacesuit. On July 19th, 1999, a naked Chuck Norris re-entered the earth's atmosphere, streaking over 14 states and reaching a temperature of 3000 degrees. An embarrassed NASA publically claimed it was a meteor, and still owes him a beer.
4.14 Roundhouse Kicks (768 votes)Rate it:12345

# 18When water gets on Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris does not get wet: the water gets Chuck Norrised.
3.97 Roundhouse Kicks (861 votes)Rate it:12345

# 148Santa Claus once put Chuck Norris on the Naughty List. This is why there is no Santa.
4.17 Roundhouse Kicks (1339 votes)Rate it:12345

# 160If you wake up in the middle of the night dead, you know for a fact that Chuck Norris has come to visit you in your sleep. And that he stole all of your beer, too.
2.88 Roundhouse Kicks (407 votes)Rate it:12345

# 231After the internet was invented Chuck Norris developed "The Norrisnet" which is exaclt the same as the internet only the final result of any webpage is a roundhouse kick and everyword is changed to "Chuck Norris"
2.48 Roundhouse Kicks (303 votes)Rate it:12345

# 469The only person to have more singles than the Beatles is Mariah Carey...The only person to have more singles than Mariah Carey is Chuck Norris...As in single blows to the head.
2.66 Roundhouse Kicks (248 votes)Rate it:12345

# 200Early in his career Bob Dylan's voice was the envy of all singers, Chuck Norris being the severly competative fellow he is promptly roundhouse kicked Mr. Dylan in the face.
2.53 Roundhouse Kicks (280 votes)Rate it:12345

# 184Chuck Norris plays darts using sharpened babies.
3.84 Roundhouse Kicks (522 votes)Rate it:12345

# 236Albert Einstein once stated that even Chuck Norris' kicks could not exceed the speed of light. Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the face. We know Albert Einstein today as Stephen Hawking.
3.83 Roundhouse Kicks (412 votes)Rate it:12345

# 143Before Chuck Norris came along, the Martial Arts were referred to merely as the Martial Crafts.
3.02 Roundhouse Kicks (402 votes)Rate it:12345

# 632Chuck Noris doesn't use the force, he is the force.
3.83 Roundhouse Kicks (389 votes)Rate it:12345

-- More Random Facts --

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