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Chuck Norris is God

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Top 10 Facts:
# 100A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.
4.35 Roundhouse Kicks (2036 votes)Rate it:12345

# 83Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
4.28 Roundhouse Kicks (3279 votes)Rate it:12345

# 1Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. But he is so badass, he has never cried. Ever.
4.26 Roundhouse Kicks (4253 votes)Rate it:12345

# 151Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
4.25 Roundhouse Kicks (2346 votes)Rate it:12345

# 105Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
4.24 Roundhouse Kicks (3198 votes)Rate it:12345

# 178Chuck Norris lost his viginity before his dad did.
4.23 Roundhouse Kicks (1641 votes)Rate it:12345

# 196Mr. A once claimed that he's tougher than Chuck Norris. Upon hearing about this, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him so hard he flew 19 letters back in the alphabet, becoming Mr. T. Chuck Norris does not pity the fool.
4.22 Roundhouse Kicks (1461 votes)Rate it:12345

# 381In the Coke vs. Pepsi Challenge, Chuck Norris chose Sprite...and he was right.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (1776 votes)Rate it:12345

# 536Scientists created Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sly Stallone, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Vin Diesel, and Hulk Hogan by using urine samples from a toilet Chuck Norris once pissed in.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (620 votes)Rate it:12345

# 101Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
4.19 Roundhouse Kicks (2726 votes)Rate it:12345

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15 Random Facts: (more)
# 162The first Justice League of America was composed entirely of Chuck Norris.
3.65 Roundhouse Kicks (420 votes)Rate it:12345

# 214Chuck Norris doesn't need to wipe.
3.51 Roundhouse Kicks (429 votes)Rate it:12345

# 291Chuck Norris once built a space station out of debris from his beard. Upon completion, Norris roundhouse kicked it into space with him on it. Soon after, CATS showed up to steal Chuck's beard-station. Just before he could finish saying, "All your base are belong to us," CATS received a roundhouse kick to the face, sending him sailing into space. After that, Chuck said, "All your face are belong to Chuck!" CATS received severe brain damage from the incident, was rendered handicapped from the neck down, and now tries to earn an honest living as a florist.
2.34 Roundhouse Kicks (364 votes)Rate it:12345

# 50Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
4.12 Roundhouse Kicks (1461 votes)Rate it:12345

# 351Chuck Norris has equipped a unique +25 ATTK Beard of Norrisism, which grants him unlimited MP and the ability to absorb fire damage.
2.55 Roundhouse Kicks (322 votes)Rate it:12345

# 86There are super-advanced aliens ready to invade earth, they are waiting until Chuck Norris dies. They are not aware that Chuck Norris can not die.
4.1 Roundhouse Kicks (681 votes)Rate it:12345

# 467It took 10 days and 4 women to give birth to Chuck Norris.
4.12 Roundhouse Kicks (824 votes)Rate it:12345

# 105Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
4.24 Roundhouse Kicks (3198 votes)Rate it:12345

# 306While attempting a roundhouse kick in his house as a child, Chuck accidentally broke a vase. His father got his belt to discipline Chuck....R.I.P Christopher Norris.
3.7 Roundhouse Kicks (340 votes)Rate it:12345

# 535In Dante's Inferno, Dante went to hell because he thought it was the safest place to hide from Chuck Norris.
3.78 Roundhouse Kicks (381 votes)Rate it:12345

# 487In Math, Chuck Norris is always greater than anything else, and is only equal to Chuck Norris.
3.82 Roundhouse Kicks (320 votes)Rate it:12345

# 427Moses didn't part the Red Sea. The wind produced by just one of Chuck Norris' roundhouse kicks scared the water into submission.
3.3 Roundhouse Kicks (275 votes)Rate it:12345

# 171The sun doesn't shine on Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris shines on the sun.
3.55 Roundhouse Kicks (397 votes)Rate it:12345

# 75Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
4.14 Roundhouse Kicks (1530 votes)Rate it:12345

# 38Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
4.14 Roundhouse Kicks (1042 votes)Rate it:12345

-- More Random Facts --

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