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Chuck Norris is God

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Top 10 Facts:
# 100A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.
4.36 Roundhouse Kicks (2030 votes)Rate it:12345

# 83Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
4.28 Roundhouse Kicks (3279 votes)Rate it:12345

# 1Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. But he is so badass, he has never cried. Ever.
4.26 Roundhouse Kicks (4253 votes)Rate it:12345

# 151Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
4.25 Roundhouse Kicks (2345 votes)Rate it:12345

# 105Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
4.24 Roundhouse Kicks (3197 votes)Rate it:12345

# 178Chuck Norris lost his viginity before his dad did.
4.23 Roundhouse Kicks (1639 votes)Rate it:12345

# 196Mr. A once claimed that he's tougher than Chuck Norris. Upon hearing about this, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him so hard he flew 19 letters back in the alphabet, becoming Mr. T. Chuck Norris does not pity the fool.
4.22 Roundhouse Kicks (1460 votes)Rate it:12345

# 381In the Coke vs. Pepsi Challenge, Chuck Norris chose Sprite...and he was right.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (1775 votes)Rate it:12345

# 536Scientists created Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sly Stallone, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Vin Diesel, and Hulk Hogan by using urine samples from a toilet Chuck Norris once pissed in.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (616 votes)Rate it:12345

# 101Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
4.19 Roundhouse Kicks (2725 votes)Rate it:12345

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15 Random Facts: (more)
# 5Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
4.09 Roundhouse Kicks (1957 votes)Rate it:12345

# 407Chuck Norris was born a twin two-thousand and six years ago on the 25th of december. His weaker brother did not survive.
3.38 Roundhouse Kicks (339 votes)Rate it:12345

# 108The Ice Age is contributed to Chuck Norris, that was the date of his last erection which blocked the sun's rays for 47 years.
3.68 Roundhouse Kicks (428 votes)Rate it:12345

# 236Albert Einstein once stated that even Chuck Norris' kicks could not exceed the speed of light. Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the face. We know Albert Einstein today as Stephen Hawking.
3.83 Roundhouse Kicks (412 votes)Rate it:12345

# 126Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him and he had a great fall. He died.
3.43 Roundhouse Kicks (474 votes)Rate it:12345

# 115Chuck Norris does not have pubic hair, he has a groin beard.
4.17 Roundhouse Kicks (988 votes)Rate it:12345

# 533Chuck Norris is the reason Charles Xavier is crippled. No one invades Chuck Norris' mind except Chuck Norris.
3.92 Roundhouse Kicks (367 votes)Rate it:12345

# 459Chuck = Legend!
1.7 Roundhouse Kicks (518 votes)Rate it:12345

# 632Chuck Noris doesn't use the force, he is the force.
3.83 Roundhouse Kicks (389 votes)Rate it:12345

# 512When Chuck Norris RhK'ed Micheal Jackson for being a better dancer, the black was knocked off of him, and consequently destroyed his face.
3.71 Roundhouse Kicks (340 votes)Rate it:12345

# 418Chuck Norris eats gun powder and shits lightning.
3.92 Roundhouse Kicks (409 votes)Rate it:12345

# 143Before Chuck Norris came along, the Martial Arts were referred to merely as the Martial Crafts.
3.02 Roundhouse Kicks (402 votes)Rate it:12345

# 397
Chuck     \O            The
Norris:   -|/           Cosmos:   o
           /

To scale.
2.45 Roundhouse Kicks (470 votes)Rate it:12345

# 189The last person to catch smallpox was Chuck Norris. This was in 1977; today, smallpox lives in a crummy low-rent apartment in Central LA under an assumed name, goes to therapy twice a week, and still has nightmares about Chuck.
3.82 Roundhouse Kicks (428 votes)Rate it:12345

# 241Every time i think of Chuck Norris... it counts as a time I've had sex!
2.34 Roundhouse Kicks (409 votes)Rate it:12345

-- More Random Facts --

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