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Chuck Norris is God - ChuckNorrisIsGod.com

Chuck Norris is God

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Top 10 Facts:
# 100A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.
4.35 Roundhouse Kicks (2036 votes)Rate it:12345

# 83Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
4.28 Roundhouse Kicks (3279 votes)Rate it:12345

# 1Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. But he is so badass, he has never cried. Ever.
4.26 Roundhouse Kicks (4253 votes)Rate it:12345

# 151Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
4.25 Roundhouse Kicks (2346 votes)Rate it:12345

# 105Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
4.24 Roundhouse Kicks (3198 votes)Rate it:12345

# 178Chuck Norris lost his viginity before his dad did.
4.23 Roundhouse Kicks (1641 votes)Rate it:12345

# 196Mr. A once claimed that he's tougher than Chuck Norris. Upon hearing about this, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him so hard he flew 19 letters back in the alphabet, becoming Mr. T. Chuck Norris does not pity the fool.
4.22 Roundhouse Kicks (1461 votes)Rate it:12345

# 381In the Coke vs. Pepsi Challenge, Chuck Norris chose Sprite...and he was right.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (1776 votes)Rate it:12345

# 536Scientists created Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sly Stallone, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Vin Diesel, and Hulk Hogan by using urine samples from a toilet Chuck Norris once pissed in.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (620 votes)Rate it:12345

# 101Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
4.19 Roundhouse Kicks (2727 votes)Rate it:12345

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15 Random Facts: (more)
# 637Chuck Norris doesn't declare war. He declares victory.
4.17 Roundhouse Kicks (896 votes)Rate it:12345

# 249When Chuck Norris walked out of his mother's womb, beard and all, his doctor tried to spank him but Chuck quickly Roundhouse kicked him into orbit, as the doctor landed he killed all the dinosaurs and himself, this was the 4th person Chuck Norris killed.
3.41 Roundhouse Kicks (339 votes)Rate it:12345

# 151Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
4.25 Roundhouse Kicks (2346 votes)Rate it:12345

# 203When the tricks rabbit didn't give Chuck Norris cereal Chuck Norris round-house kicked him in the face and preceeded to have his way with him.
2.71 Roundhouse Kicks (420 votes)Rate it:12345

# 310Chuck Norris was there for the Clone Wars. When some Jedi tried to use the force to defeat him, he laughed so hard that they were immediately transformed into a bunch of fictional characters created by some dude named George.
2.93 Roundhouse Kicks (363 votes)Rate it:12345

# 31Chuck Norris originally appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris replied, "That's no glitch."
3.97 Roundhouse Kicks (629 votes)Rate it:12345

# 451Chuck Norris is the reason hitler spared red-heads.
3.78 Roundhouse Kicks (351 votes)Rate it:12345

# 175Once, between scenes on the set of Walker Texas Ranger, an actor asked Chuck, "Why do you always deliver roundhouse kicks to the bad guys? Why donít you mix it up?" Norris bit his lip and replied, "Good idea." Bad idea. After shooting, Chuck asked the man to meet him in the alley behind the studio. Here, Chuck roundhouse kicked the man 37 times in the face, all the while saying, "What now, bitch?"
2.94 Roundhouse Kicks (449 votes)Rate it:12345

# 98Achilles was supposedly the greatest warrior of all time, but he died because of his weak spot, the Achilles tendon. There is no Chuck Norris tendon.
4.16 Roundhouse Kicks (678 votes)Rate it:12345

# 47Chuck Norris does not teabag the ladies. He potato-sacks them.
4.15 Roundhouse Kicks (3163 votes)Rate it:12345

# 281Chuck Norris is not high on life. Life is high on Chuck Norris.
3.52 Roundhouse Kicks (326 votes)Rate it:12345

# 40There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
4.15 Roundhouse Kicks (3183 votes)Rate it:12345

# 645If you're in Texas, don't look behind you, cause Chuck Norris will Roundhouse Kick you in the face.
2.87 Roundhouse Kicks (315 votes)Rate it:12345

# 9Chuck Norris doesn't wash his clothes, he disembowels them.
3.82 Roundhouse Kicks (1132 votes)Rate it:12345

# 589Chuck Norris passed over to the other side with a roundhouse kick and saw God. And he wasn't even impressed.
2.99 Roundhouse Kicks (283 votes)Rate it:12345

-- More Random Facts --

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