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Chuck Norris is God

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Top 10 Facts:
# 100A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.
4.35 Roundhouse Kicks (2037 votes)Rate it:12345

# 83Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
4.28 Roundhouse Kicks (3280 votes)Rate it:12345

# 1Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. But he is so badass, he has never cried. Ever.
4.26 Roundhouse Kicks (4253 votes)Rate it:12345

# 151Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
4.25 Roundhouse Kicks (2347 votes)Rate it:12345

# 105Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
4.24 Roundhouse Kicks (3198 votes)Rate it:12345

# 178Chuck Norris lost his viginity before his dad did.
4.23 Roundhouse Kicks (1641 votes)Rate it:12345

# 196Mr. A once claimed that he's tougher than Chuck Norris. Upon hearing about this, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him so hard he flew 19 letters back in the alphabet, becoming Mr. T. Chuck Norris does not pity the fool.
4.22 Roundhouse Kicks (1462 votes)Rate it:12345

# 381In the Coke vs. Pepsi Challenge, Chuck Norris chose Sprite...and he was right.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (1777 votes)Rate it:12345

# 536Scientists created Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sly Stallone, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Vin Diesel, and Hulk Hogan by using urine samples from a toilet Chuck Norris once pissed in.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (620 votes)Rate it:12345

# 101Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
4.19 Roundhouse Kicks (2728 votes)Rate it:12345

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15 Random Facts: (more)
# 58Chuck Norris doesnt shave; he kicks himself in the face. The only thing that can cut Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris.
3.97 Roundhouse Kicks (577 votes)Rate it:12345

# 332Chuck Norris saw mommy kissing Santa Claus, the next morning they found his arm in Cuba.
3.84 Roundhouse Kicks (341 votes)Rate it:12345

# 2The number three cause of death in America is Diabetes. Chuck Norris is numbers one and two.
4.12 Roundhouse Kicks (2097 votes)Rate it:12345

# 462When Chuck Norris puts his foot down, Tsunami's happen.
2.61 Roundhouse Kicks (342 votes)Rate it:12345

# 414Chuck says there are three types of people in this world: those who can count and those who can't. He roundhouse kicked the other guy.
3.32 Roundhouse Kicks (288 votes)Rate it:12345

# 27Chuck Norris has two speeds: Walk and Kill.
4.15 Roundhouse Kicks (1102 votes)Rate it:12345

# 42If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'til." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
3.97 Roundhouse Kicks (639 votes)Rate it:12345

# 45Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the fuck down.
4.14 Roundhouse Kicks (894 votes)Rate it:12345

# 235In the future all football players will be genetic copies of Chuck Norris. However, the original Chuck Norris will dominate them easily, because not even fake Chucks are as good as the real Chuck.
2.24 Roundhouse Kicks (375 votes)Rate it:12345

# 293Chuck Norris Round-Kicked The Nose Off Of The Great Sphinx.
2.78 Roundhouse Kicks (303 votes)Rate it:12345

# 307Chuck Norris does not do infomercials. He does, buy this fucking product or I'll kill youmercials.
3.04 Roundhouse Kicks (336 votes)Rate it:12345

# 290When Chuck Norris first saw his reflection, he was shocked to see that there is another man as manly and good looking as him. So he said "boo" and the relfection promptly rolled over and died.
3.72 Roundhouse Kicks (362 votes)Rate it:12345

# 54When Chuck Norris plays Oregon Trail, his family does not die from cholera or dysentery, but rather, roundhouse kicks to the face. He also requires no wagon, since he carries the oxen, axels, and buffalo meat on his back. He always makes it to Oregon before you.
3.51 Roundhouse Kicks (482 votes)Rate it:12345

# 595General Swartzkopf once saw Chuck Norris in K-Mart wearing an American Flag wifebeater. He now refuses to salute anyone else.
3.42 Roundhouse Kicks (571 votes)Rate it:12345

# 226Chuck Norris came before both the chicken and the egg.
3.9 Roundhouse Kicks (405 votes)Rate it:12345

-- More Random Facts --

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